Macheronic English

Dear mam,
i want to raccont you things about my soggiorn in London. My English is not molto well, so i write you qualche thing as i can.
Today in London is the solit day of copert sky, and it can rain from a moment to another. For this reason you must ever port an umbrella with you and don’t scord your kway, that is impermeable jacket wich repare yourself from the water that falls from the damned wet sky. When you esc from the house there a lot of beautiful kids that enter in the schools. They speak in English, and that is very sorprendent bacause they are very little and have imparated this lenguage, nonostant their small age. I invid them very much. Then you must go to your school to migliorate your conoscenz of language and to speak with other people that knows less than you about things that are not important. But it’s the system and you can’t change it. The teachers of the school are very gentil with me, overall if i pay my iscrition to the course. The autobuses are very tall, two floors, with attic and kitchen if you want. Every morning all people go di frett, bacause here all people are important businessman, also the women. They go to the city, that is a place full of money, but i have never saw a monet on the floor. I don’t know why. To go to your lesson you must prend the tube, that is not a long piece of gom, through wich pass the water, but a sort of train that goes under earth. When you arrive in a fermat a gentle voice says: “mind the cap”, if qualcun scord his cap on the sit. They are very gentle in recording you that. The city is full of beatiful things, overall many gardens in wich you can see very very animals: scoiattols, pellicans, cignos, papers and gabbians. Insom a lot of strange animals, that in Italy we cant see spess. You can incontr also the queen, bacause the queen lives in his palace, near the centre. You can gust many tipes of beers. They are very good, but they cost very much. The problem of the money is not easy to resolve. They have a strange money, that is divers from the nostr one. The name is paund. One paund is cent pens. Nothing cost less of 5 paunds, so you must send me a lot of other money for my things. The people are very gentle, they say spess the same thing: “Sorry”, that means: “Sorridi” in italian. But it is a little bit strange. In fact when somebody calpest your feet he say to you: “Sorry”. You must do the sforce of sorry, non ostant the dolor of the feet. When you starnutisc somebody say “Bless you”, that means “tu sei benedetto”, but i think that port a little of sfig… because you are ill and starnutisc and they say you are fortunate. I dont understand this.
There are very very things that i can raccont to you, but for the moment that’s is abbastance. I salut you with very affect and i kiss you.
Your devoted son.